Sheetal :)

"Change is hard at first, Messy in the middle and Gorgeous at the end." Change is one of those things no one looks forward to. Mostly because it reminds us that life is not as stagnant as we believe it to be and is a phenomenon we blissfully ignore. Until there actually comes a time where it can't be ignored anymore. It can mean a change in lifestyle, a big move, erasing a few things or people,or even making the tiniest changes. For me, it was moving continents away from home. Alone. In any sense, we do not enjoy it. We are told that it is so we can move forward towards the bigger picture. That is a load of crap it seems. Cause, let's be honest. The bigger picture is a million light years away and does not seem at all attractive at the time. Because it means coming out of that cocoon of warmth that we have been wrapped up in our whole lives and breathing in that cold air. That cold, hit you in the face with a ton of bricks air. It means taking a step into the unk...

New places. New chapter. New everything.  Anything new in an otherwise set in stone life is almost never a pleasant change. It is a constant inner battle on whether you stay true to yourself and not try as hard, or just give yourself and your beliefs up and just try so hard to fit in. And God its hard. It's such an unfair choice to have to make. The more common and go to choice would be to just say "to hell with it, I need friends goddammit " and just do anything, ANYTHING, to fit in and be heard. But it just almost close to never works. It's frustrating  but it doesn't.  It is just this phase of a whirlwind of emotions, not feeling a 100% , bottomline just feeling like shit really.  I can't describe  it really. It goes from looking in the mirror and going who the hell is that girl looking at me to wanting to just give yourself a really hard slap. It also ranges from I'm  alone and am just going to give up and not care to where the hell is my best friend I...